The Beginning

I'm starting to understand the reasons why. There's no excuse, but sometimes things just happen. One thing starts and before we know it we've wrapped ourselves up in it and it's out of control; you're out of control. The more time passes, the harder it gets. At first it may have been to fill the void or you're doing it out of spite. Then, we get attached to something.

Why do we always end up doing it to those we profess to love? Maybe we think that they'll forgive us. We take them for granted or get "comfortable". We lie to others and in turn, we lie to ourselves. We think as long as we can get away with these lies then there's no problem. Why rock the boat? Maybe there was something missing in our lives and we think we are gaining something through someone else. In the end, there's a hollow shell and you're left with less than you had before. Yes, it's true - everything eventually does catch up with you. And, when it does you might try to run or hide - but it only makes things worse. And, then you think to yourself that you really fucked it up this time. The answer is yeah, you fucked it up BIG time.

But, with time comes realization. Realization brings acceptance. And, with acceptance there can be a need for change. I believe that before you can fix anything there must be change. And, for once, you have to be selfish and change for you and only you. So, have the courage to start acting like the responsible, amazing, selfless, good person everyone knows you to be - then I guarantee you that you'll begin to see that in yourself too. It's never too late to start from the beginning.